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Guile A magnificent animal of a man
Registered: Sep 2001 Posts: 2659 - Threads: 68 Location: A wretched hive of scum and villainy
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Criminal Anthropology Simulation Master Class
Difficulty level:6
You may struggle without the correct training and background in Criminal Anthropology. Play catch up:
Here with: "YOU ARE THE..."
&
Here with: "WHAT'S MY CRIME?"
Contains offensive and despicable content that is too controversial and too awesome for children. The stark, ugly, profound truths KING CON exposes may be soul crushing to the weak of spirit. If you allow a child to read this thread you are a bad parent or guardian. Contains strong action violence and sexualised posing.
Ready?
Well let's play:
KING CON
Have you got what it takes to rise like the scum you are to the top of the rancid pool that is H.M.P. Hafa Towers?
Each episode will give you choices to make, relying not only your Criminal Anthropology skill sets you will have to lie, bribe, cheat, intimidate, claw, gouge, shag and sweet talk your way to the top of the shit heap.
CAN YOU BECOME:
KING CON
BONUS MISSION
Past breakfast and the doors haven't been opened. The wing is on lock-down. Every cell is going to be tossed (searched) by D.S.T. (Dedicated Search Team)
The wing Custodial Manager, Senior Prison Officer Fulton Mackay is leading the search. He knows you are a recidivist and a trouble maker and can't wait to catch you out and remove your privileges. A former Drill Sergeant in the Argyll and Sutherland Highlanders 1st Battalion he despises men like you.
"Oh your cell is going to get tossed all over the shop laddie. Ah'm doing it meself."
It's a real one-off, it never happens usually cos you're too smart but today you're actually holding some weight and the lock down this morning wasn't expected tbf.
Caught with your fucking knickers down.
You've got 4 ounces of BenzoFury. That's 6-APB if you go by the fucking spaghetti alphabet soup names that drugs have nowadays.
The youth fucking love this shit
You can hear the rub down going off two cells away, you've still got a bit of time...
"A'm aff tae search prisoner 13's cell efter this one"
Where are you going to stash the gear? Pick one of the following locations and hope Senior Prison Officer Fulton Mackay doesn't think to search it. You can use up to 4 different hiding places if you think that will work better for you. [Sometimes if the screws find a package they think they've got the lot and stop looking. Sometimes they don't.]
IT'S A FREE CHOICE!
"Ah ken youse git gear in 'ere somewhere laddie"
Post your stash place[s] of choice before the thread closes and see if you get to keep the BenzoFury and earn the RESPECT of the jail.
Will you hide the BenzoFury by:
01. Using a small magnet to hold the bag to the underside of your steel bedside table.
02. Placing the bag into the secret pocket you've sewn into the right leg of your trousers.
03. Concealing the bag in the light fittings.
04. Wrapping the bag in a black t-shirt and hiding it under the cabinet. [This may work because screws will be looking under the cabinet with a mirror on a stick. They will be expecting to see blackness and that's what you're giving them.]
"Tell me whaur th' gear is and it'll gang easier fur youse"
05. There is a missing block in the wall of your windowsill. The aperture has been covered with cardboard painted to match the rest of the wall.
06. Putting it inside the fire alarm.
07. Putting it inside the steel bed frame.
08. Up the aris it goes, or maybe clenched between your buttocks. Swallowed perhaps, to be retrieved some 24 hours later... Always assuming of course nothing untoward happens to you.
"Now boys. Nevir, and Ah repeat nevir gie this man the benefit o' th' doubt"
09. Putting it in a plastic bag tied to a piece of string, the bag floated around the U bend and the string tied to a biro cut to the width of the pipe to act as a wedge.
10. Putting it in the lining of your baccy tins. (Slang for prison issue plastic shoes)
"Aha! Got youse! Check ower thare again. He keeps looking ower thare"
11. Putting it in your mattress/pillow.
12. Concealing it in your toiletries, perhaps your antiperspirant can, or your anti-dandruff shampoo bottle?
"Ah ken thir's gear in 'ere. Ah'll get a sniffer hoond"
13. Using a Hollowed out book. That Bible finally came in useful and not just as an emergency skin supply!
14. Perhaps you wish to propose an alternative to the above. If it's really ingenious and you don't want the others to know - pm me.
If you magically still have drugs after everyone else has lost theirs, well yes, you're the man now, dog.
Take on Senior Prison Officer Fulton Mackay and WIN! and the RESPECT points you gain will be STELLAR
Crib Notes:
Not much in the library, maybe this?
Oh, fuck it all and just relax for a change with:
and
Results will be published next week.
Only available on HaFa
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16-09-2018 21:09 PM |
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