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HarderFaster Forums >> General Mayhem >> Thought for the day

 
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Private1

Registered: Aug 2002
Posts: 40942 - Threads: 1198
Location: London


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There was a man in front of me in the queue in tesco's buying condoms.
When the cashier asked if he needed a bag, he said "No, she isn't that ugly"

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Old Post04-09-2017 06:32 AM
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louloubell
Back on the naughty step

Registered: Apr 2003
Posts: 14578 - Threads: 1031
Location: On my merry go roundabout

Feeling rather mellow & content. A delinquent pigeon hit mum's window sat evening. Poor thing didn't seem able to get off the ground, so we took it in for the night. Took it to the sanctuary yesterday. It didn't seem to have damaged its wings. Cute little thing - for a pigeon.

Karma is a beautiful thing.

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Old Post04-09-2017 09:16 AM
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Private1

Registered: Aug 2002
Posts: 40942 - Threads: 1198
Location: London

Gyms should offer a membership package where you pay for every day that you don't go.

According to physics, nothing ever quite touches. When you lay your hand on something, there is a microscopic amount of space between the atoms of your hand and whatever you're touching... so no, officer, technically I'm not jacking off right now

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Old Post07-09-2017 13:19 PM
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Private1

Registered: Aug 2002
Posts: 40942 - Threads: 1198
Location: London

You could seriously piss off your neighbours by buying a puppy giving it the same name as their child.

According to physics, nothing ever quite touches. When you lay your hand on something, there is a microscopic amount of space between the atoms of your hand and whatever you're touching... so no, officer, technically I'm not jacking off right now

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Old Post08-09-2017 12:02 PM
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Quin.
???

Registered: Oct 2010
Posts: 33316 - Threads: 426
Location: london

Quote:
Private1 wrote on 01-09-2017 09:16 AM

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Laughs out loud

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those that could not hear the music -Nietzsche

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Old Post11-09-2017 09:41 AM
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Private1

Registered: Aug 2002
Posts: 40942 - Threads: 1198
Location: London

Avoid wasting time brushing your teeth by simply adding toothpaste to your food instead.

According to physics, nothing ever quite touches. When you lay your hand on something, there is a microscopic amount of space between the atoms of your hand and whatever you're touching... so no, officer, technically I'm not jacking off right now

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Old Post11-09-2017 16:47 PM
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kerb

Registered: Nov 2005
Posts: 24383 - Threads: 1623
Location:

dont flick a joint on the floor where there are a pair of stone island nylon swim shorts

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Old Post11-09-2017 18:18 PM
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Private1

Registered: Aug 2002
Posts: 40942 - Threads: 1198
Location: London

The object of golf, is to play the least amount of golf.

According to physics, nothing ever quite touches. When you lay your hand on something, there is a microscopic amount of space between the atoms of your hand and whatever you're touching... so no, officer, technically I'm not jacking off right now

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Old Post12-09-2017 16:09 PM
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